Are you suffering in silence?
This year has been nothing less than a string of polarizing events, one after another. In all my years on planet earth I cannot recall a time such as this. Tragic event after tragic event it has been quite unnerving and frightening. Reading the headlines or exposing yourself to just a few moments of local news can be overwhelming and suffocating. From the constant BREAKING NEWS of COVID-19 to National riots and civic unrest, to a brutal election poised to be as divisive as ever, I have to be honest and say I do not feel free to share my own personal pain if it is not specifically about one of these topics.
With all of the suffering going on is it fair that we should acknowledge or share our own struggles and anxieties outside these important events? If our conversation cannot be tied directly to the number of people infected or the immense pain of the black community, is there a place for me to talk about why I’m hurting?
Don’t get me wrong, I understand that the impact COVID has had and continues to have is so far reaching that it cannot be fathomed. Ultimately, a lot of pain that we are experiencing can be as a result of the virus or the social unrest. But my question is; is it “safe” to share my pain with someone about issues and challenges outside the headlines or do I have to suppress what I feel in order to remain sympathetic to what is glaringly wrong in our times?
What about the mom who recently was told by her gynecologist that her baby has died? Or, what is a mom and dad to say about the still born child they just lost but cannot have a funeral because of social guidelines for distancing?
Imagine the anxieties many are having over their senior parents locked down in a nursing home, with rules that keep them isolated. Or, like my own father in law who lost his beloved wife three years ago and now sits in a big quiet house by himself, day after day, with nothing to do but pass the time. Oh, he has the occasional family member stop by to check on him or share a meal with him, but for the most part he suffers from deep loneliness and grief over his loss.
And speaking of isolation, what about the couple who spent years trying to fill their home with the happy feet of little ones only to find themselves now locked down in a home where neither one can go to work, only to be reminded each day of their pain of infertility.
What about you? Are you suffering alone, in silence? Do you have someone you can talk with about your own polarizing pain and fears? Your battle with depression or addiction or loneliness should not be minimized or ignored. It’s real. It’s important and it’s crucial you find someone with whom you can share your burdens with, giving them permission to do the same with you. Oftentimes it’s a friend. A close co-worker, or a neighbor. For those who have a great marriage, it can be your spouse.
Please know your pain is important and deserves to be heard. As it’s shared with someone and you find some of the heaviness lifted, you can then be a safe place for someone else who needs to share their burdens. God calls His followers to be burden bearers, did you know that? Not to take on their pain and make it all yours, but to help a friend, colleague or mate to carry their load of difficulty by listening to them and giving them permission to come to you when they need to. Who knows, you might even have insight as to what they need to hear to work through their pain and help them move through it.
There are many great ministries that have resources on these kinds of issues and many of them even have 24/7 prayer lines you can call and have someone pray with you. Focus on The Family, Family Life Today and Insight For Living all have websites with plenty of tools for you to read on this type of discussion.
Please remember, The God and Creator of your soul cares about everything that you experience in this life and no problem is too small or too big for Him to handle. He will help you if you bring your burdens and cares to Him in an honest open manner, asking for His help. Scripture teaches us that The Lord bends down to hear the prayers of His children and those who seek Him will be heard.
Please, don’t suffer in silence. Find someone to share your burdens and be there for them when they need you.
-Terry
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